After the concerts, he's going to take up golfing

Well well well. It is the end of an era, again.

Michael Jackson announced today that he is throwing in the towel on 'it' :

"This is it," Jackson said in a brief statement ... "And when I say this is it, I mean this is it."

Please BOB let it be so.

Here he is at the press conference:



But by 'it' he kind of means 'ish', because he might be playing gigs elsewhere in the world. So it's just the people in the Kingdom United by the Queen who he no longer will perform tooapparently, at night, grammar skills are gone to whom he will no longer perform, probably.

If I were a fan, I would be only mildly worried at this possible cessation. Twice I have gotten in a taxi driven by dudes who were such big fans of Michael they were almost wearing military jackets. One drove with a white glove. Fortunately, I wasn't going very far in either case, because neither of them were very good singers. YES. THEY SANG.

Have you ever heard a british taxi driver sing 'Shamone...HEE HEE HEE'? It is very disconcerting.

On Wednesday, Jackson launched a lawsuit against an auction house to stop the scheduled sale of more than 2,000 personal items from Neverland, including platinum and gold records, a customized Harley Davidson and a Rolls Royce limousine.

Really. MJ has a Harley. REALLy. Well that's easy to picture. He is such a Hell's Angel-ish dude. The streets would be so much safer if they alleviated him of that possession. I know *I'd* feel safer.



Apparently, if you own expensive things and used to be the King of Pop (they're now saying it's Justin Timberlake...that's really another post...), you can show up more than an hour late.

You know, when I'm going to be more than about fifteen minutes late, I call.

If I'm going to be more than twenty minutes late, I bring muffins.

If I'm going to be an HOUR late, I say I'm not coming. Then I buy the person a great big chocolate apology cake (that's for Sybil).

WHERE IS THEIR GREAT BIG CHOCOLATE APOLOGY CAKE?

I imagine Michael's not great in the kitchen, so he'd have to go to PTescos.

TO BE CLEAR - I never imagine Michael in his home. I don't need those kind of thoughts in my brain.

This is for Quilly :

I imagine that Michael Jackson's paucity of good sense comes from his post-stardom apanthropinization, which would not have occurred had he stuck with his childhood instrument, the zither.


Michael, playing an early, less scary version of "Thriller"